Why Women Who Lead Must Master Goal Setting

There’s a reason the world’s most visionary leaders don’t settle for the safe or the simple. They swing big. They risk failure. And they build grit and resilience not by accident, but by design.

In my decades of coaching elite performers—from Olympic athletes to pioneering CEOs—I’ve seen the same truth emerge: bold goal setting is the bedrock of courageous, transformational leadership.

Yet for too long, women have been encouraged to aim low and play nice. We’ve been told that "realistic" goals are "smart" goals. That blending in is safer than standing out. But realistic doesn’t reshape industries. Attainable doesn’t shift paradigms. Playing small doesn’t serve the world—or our leadership potential.

If you’re a woman who wants to lead with impact, it’s time to reclaim the audacity to set big, meaningful goals— and the grit to see them through. Not just for yourself, but for every woman watching and wondering if it’s possible.

Grit: The X-Factor Of Great Leadership

One of the most powerful ideas I encountered during my time at the University of Pennsylvania’s Masters in Applied Positive Psychology program came from Angela Duckworth. Her research defines grit as “passion and perseverance for long-term goals,” and confirms it is more predictive of success than IQ, talent, or luck.

What I’ve found through my work is this: grit is contagious.

When women display what I call authentic grit—grit that uplifts others and is rooted in values, not ego—it spreads. Teams become braver. Cultures become more resilient. Possibility replaces burnout.

Authentic grit is not about grinding yourself down to please others. It’s not perfectionism in disguise. It’s about doing hard things on purpose, in alignment with your purpose. This is the kind of leadership that inspires transformation, not just performance.

Why SMART Goals Are Failing Us

Let me be direct: SMART goals are a zombie idea.

They’re catchy. They’re teachable. And they’re utterly uninspiring on top of not leading to optimal outcomes.

In my book Big Goals, I explain why this framework—Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, Time-bound— leads to mediocrity, not meaning. SMART goals are about playing small. They encourage incrementalism when we need innovation.

Instead, I teach Goal Setting Theory by Locke and Latham—the most validated management theory in the world—and pair it with my BRIDGE Methodology, a research-based framework for achieving bold, values-aligned goals. BRIDGE stands for:

• Brainstorming with boldness
• Relationships that fuel achievement
• Investments in well-being and emotional capital
• Decision-making that eliminates noise and bias
• Good Grit, grounded in passion and perseverance
• Excellence, not perfectionism

This model empowers women to pursue goals that are not just big, but deeply meaningful—and therefore, more likely to be accomplished with the right kind of grit.

Resilience Is a Skill, Not A Trait

Leadership is hard. And for women, it’s often harder—because we’re navigating cultures that still question our ambition and scrutinize our success.

Resilience isn’t about bouncing back. It’s about bouncing forward—emerging stronger, wiser, and more grounded in purpose. And it’s something we can all build.

Positive Psychology research shows that resilient leaders do three things exceptionally well:

1. They reframe setbacks as stepping stones, not stop signs.
2. They stay anchored in meaning, especially during difficulty.
3. They prioritize emotional well- being, because flourishing fuels high performance.

In my own life, recovering from bulimia became my proving ground. It didn’t derail my ambition—it clarified it. It gave me grit, purpose, and a story worth sharing. That’s why I close many speeches with a line that saved me in early recovery:

“You can’t keep what you don’t give away.”

If you’ve earned your grit through adversity, pass it on. Show the next generation that resilience is learned— and leadership is possible.

How Women Can Activate Big Leadership Today

So what now? If you’re ready to lead with grit and grace, here’s where to begin:

1. Set a Soul-Stretching Goal

Ask yourself: What goal would make me proud, even if I failed? That’s the one worth chasing.

2. Curate Your Inner Circle

Surround yourself with people who push you to grow, who challenge your thinking, and who celebrate your wins. Be that person for others, too.

3. Invest in Your Well-Being

This isn’t optional. Research shows that happiness precedes success—not the other way around. Flourishing is your foundation.

4. Make Bold, Values-Based Decisions

Ditch fear-based thinking. Eliminate noise and overcome bias. Trust your gut, and make choices that honor who you are and what you believe.

5. Model Good Grit

Be the leader who climbs the mountain and brings others with her. Avoid faux grit, selfie grit, and stupid grit—because only authentic grit builds trust, teams, and traction.

6. Practice Ampliship

Amplify the success of other women, especially in public. Celebrate their wins out loud. This rewires culture and undermines the myth that powerful women don’t support each other.

The Call to Rise

We’re living in a moment that demands more from us—not more busyness, but more boldness. Not more tasks, but more truth. Women who lead today must be ready to set big goals, rise with resilience, and carry others with them.

So I’ll ask you the same question I ask every woman I coach:

Are you still waiting For permission, or are You ready to lead the Way?

Because here’s the truth: You are the permission. You are the proof. You are the beginning of what’s next.